NOTE: Everything on this archived site is quite dated except for the Kimmel-related stuff. This particular piece might not work for anyone except Jimmy (and maybe only the P.S. and the hidden David Sanborn riffs at that). [If this bores, jump to Pacquiao Paradigm.]

If God Takes Me Away on Our Skunk Train Holiday (Before I Rock with Jimmy)
Dedicated to making sure that Jimmy receives what’s coming to him (related to LOST and what can be found, all else being equal).
by Ricardo Bueyhombre

“Locke’s existence has become meaningful in his death….” — Nikki Stafford, Lost chronicler

I could never get the hang of ideology
I do the rock (it’s stimulating!) — Tim Curry

I (I, I, I) think that Sylvie and Marcello and I will be traveling up to Mendocino Country this week to honor our promise to ‘Cello… to ride the Fort Bragg Skunk Train.

If I die a horrible death on the way up or back, or on the Skunk Train itself, I’d like Jimmy Kimmel & The Gang to make sure that they read every Kimmel related piece on this archived site. For those articles are not dated, and deserve to be acted upon in some way, shape or form, as they say. Kimmel & Co. can feel free to contact Sylvie and/or Marcello on this, for those two have been with me as I’ve worked 24×8 forever on what’s now become a Kimmel-centered work of art (in the political arena). And I don’t want to have all those heartbeats consigned to the Memory Hole. In fact, I’d like that ABC crowd to consider doing something along the lines I’ve suggested — anything! — even if my demise is pleasant.

Although I am of unsound mind in the Hedbergian sense, I am of sound mind and body as per the legal parameters for dictating one’s Last Will and Testament. And so, let it be known that this is my dying wish.

The violence and unhealthy aura+ which surrounds virtually all career politicians begs for a counterpart in acton. In action which follows a new paradigm. Only comedy and sex can be poised against such a formidable, visceral challenge, and I submit that Jimmy Kimmel is just the Handsome Man for the job, the ideal guy to lead the way. [Yes, our working figurehead candidate must be attractive!]

I’ve said this before, but I’ll say it again. I don’t care if Jimmy and I differ about who pays for the 24-hour’s worth of lights in Las Vegas daily. I don’t care if Cleto Sr. embraces a different stance than I do on, say, Cuba. And it matters not that Gary Greenberg and I might very well wind up accusing one another of being self-hating Jews (for different reasons) given enough time in a closed space together. The Comedy/Sex angle is the only shot we have, I believe, at rallying people soon enough. People will get together over what appears to be a Grand Practical Joke (even if it is quite different than any other similar effort from the past… with an unprecedented edge to it).

It’s okay if the whole shebang never rises above being a national joke. Que Sera Sera. To pull the curtain down, exposing the Wizard of Oz, will be of great value.

As long as someone among the Kimmel entourage points to something along the way a la the spirit of Donald Sutherland’s character in the remake of Invasion of the Body Snatchers. For the healthy people on this planet, the ones capable of authentic living, are now the aliens.

Loving regards from the bottom of my new found heart,
Your Ox

P.S. I haven’t been watching Jimmy’s beloved LOST, but I noticed today that Nikki Stafford’s Finding Lost: Season Five has a photo of Jacob reading Flannery O’Connor’s Everything That Rises Must Converge. Apparently, Nikki feels that Season 6 will have many parallels with O’Connor’s work, many secrets being accessible through an informed comparison. For what it’s worth, I’d like to have my huge collection of Flannery-related literature passed on to Jimmy for his enlightenment… if I pass on… on the Skunk Train or thereabouts. [Pause.] It occurs to me that perhaps it would be in his interest, though, to plan a rendezvous with me… as I met Flannery a few times when I was a boy (See http://oxtogrind.org/archive/378), and I might very well be able to shed some light on this or that… drawing upon my experience wtih her peacocks or her pre-lupus blah blah. [Pause.] And I could bring along a rare FO’C video that really rocks.